Twice this week already I have been asked, incredulously, how I do it. How do I do a long distance relationship? And not one in which we're separated by a "mere" 8 hours in a car, we're separated by like 6 country boarders, by a 6 hour plane ride, by a time zone.
That question is normally followed promptly by why?
I think it is interesting that both people who asked me, no doubt thinking to themselves, "there is no way I'd do it," were woman. I say this is interesting because I've always thought woman were more open to long distance relationships, lets just call them LDRs for convenience sake. Of course that's not entirely fair, since for every woman in an LDR there is more than likely a guy on the other end of it, so maybe I should give the male gender more credit...anyway, back to my point.
My response to this question so far has always been "it's hard, but..." and then my voice trails off. But what? But it's worth it? But we're managing? Why do I even say "it's hard." Isn't that pretty much implied in the name? Who would ever want to go through an LDR, anyway?
Truth be told it isn't nearly as hard as I always imagined it would be. And I think that's because when you know it's the right person, even if you're a million miles away, it just feels...right.
I imagine if you're one of those people who knew me during my years at Mars Hill, when I was pretty much the biggest cynic known to man when it came to love and a relationship, let alone an LDR, you're probably wondering what happened to me.
My answer to you is: Mr. Right.
So how and why do I do it? I do it always thinking of the end to this madness, that day when we're finally together in the same country, when I finally get my fairy-take ending.
I do it thinking of his smile when he sees me for the first time in months at the airport.
I do it because every time he hugs me I still get butterflies in my stomach. Because when I think of having a family, I think of him, and a beautiful little Latina girl with long brown (red?) hair.
I do it because every time I think about him, I catch myself smiling. Because when I look at a picture of us together, I can still feel the warmth of his arms around me (that sounded very Jodi Picoult of me...).
I do it because even now, after an entire year of being apart, he still finishes a conversation over Skype with "hablamos mañana fijo," we'll talk tomorrow definitely. I know we'll talk tomorrow, sweetie, that goes without saying. I guess I just find this cute.
I do it because not a day goes by that he doesn't tell me I'm beautiful.
I do it because being with him makes me a better person. Because when I'm with him I'm not as impatient, or angry, or pessimistic. I do it because after being with him for just a few months, I had less road rage (true story, and then of course I reverted back to my old self after a few months apart).
I do it thinking of all the fun baking I can do for him and knowing he will never getting tired of eating dessert.
I do it because I know he would do anything for me, including giving up his life in Costa Rica to be with me here in the USA, which is more than I can say for myself. I do it because I know there is no one on this planet who could ever love me as much as he does.
I do it thinking of all free tennis lessons (and awesome tennis gear) I'll have for the rest of my life (come on, I had to add this one in here!)
I do it because I know he deserves more than me, but he chose me anyway. I do it because after God brought my soul mate into my life, I'd be an idiot to let something so small as distance get between us.
I truly have been blessed to have my Rolito in my life. At some point, every couple goes through a hard time, and I like to think that this is ours. Once we make it through it will be smooth sailing!
Te amo mi amor! Para siempre!
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